Bright, Bright Sun-Shiny Day!! Part 2

There are a couple of ways to deal with depression – distraction, this is where you are filling your life with a constant stream of activities and pleasures which relieve the pain but never really get to the root of the problem. Or you can accept that you have weaknesses, take hold of God’s promise that with Him you can overcome anything, and slowly begin to work through them with Him, facing and overcoming each, one at a time. There is no quick fix to depression but it can be overcome. With that being said and knowing that the first option doesn’t work let’s dive into the second choice…

How many times have we sat in the presence of great teaching, took notes, and applied little or none of it to our lives? I can’t even count…so today I am going to use a principle taught by a great teacher I know. I have started this and never finished but this time it will get done. I have to if I want to end this. My first step, which is the easy part, is I took a piece of paper and folded it in half. On one side I wrote my issues, the things that were making life dark. Then on the other side next to each issue I listed what the Word has to say about them. Now, I am about to prioritize the list and start with the first one and began a prayer and fast cycle till I have knocked off each one. Next, we will talk about the prayer and fast cycle, and I will let you know how it’s working for me…until next time, peace and hair grease.

Bright, Bright Sun-Shiny Day!!

I can see clearly now, the rain is gone, I can see all obstacles in my way. Gone are the dark clouds that had me blind. It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright) Sun-Shiny day.

I think I can make it now, the pain is gone. All of the bad feelings have disappeared. Here is the rainbow I’ve been prayin for. It’s gonna be a bright (bright), bright (bright) Sun-Shiny day.

I bet seeing that song posted is a relief to those closest to me. The last few days were not so Sun-Shiny. It was a tad bit Doom-Gloomy.

Testimony time…THE PRAYERS OF THE RIGHTEOUS AVAILETH MUCH!!!

Thanks, Saints Family…Even though I shut you out you didn’t give up. Thanks for giving me my space, even though having you right here to fight with me would have been easier. I appreciate ya’ll letting me do it my way (no matter how dumb it seemed).

Ok, back to the song… The 1st verse rings really true, working on all of the 2nd one being totally true. There are times in my life when circumstances get out of control. I have a way of not dealing with stuff. I tend to stamp it down, throw dirt on it, and bury it hoping it doesn’t grow new roots and re-sprout. But, I have learned (seem like I would heed it, right) that just because it’s buried doesn’t make it dead. For years I have off and on battled depression. Battled and not won but come to truces with the enemy. Only to have to fight that fight again. But, this time I want to whip it for good. I am tired of playing into his hand. Tired of tucking my tail and running. Tired of waving white flags and surrendering to the enemy. So, my next few posts are going to reveal my plan and how it’s working for me… Stay tuned for part 2.

C’est la Vie

The past few days have been real funky for me. Being sick, with no car and stuck in the house really brings reality into focus. On top of all that my birthday was Saturday…my kids, Mom, Dad, and siblings forgot (they all simultaneously remembered around 5PM). That really sucked so…anyway. I guess it could be worse. Optimism is what they call that, ha…sorry that was funny to me.

So, how did I react to everything…turned off my phone, took a xanax (not really) (or maybe it’s still a little foggy and cried for 2 days straight. Was that the right thing to do? By most standards no, but it felt good. Needed that cry. Oh, and I have been walking. Walked the other night, yesterday morning and thinking about heading out right now…not…it’s snowing. I know this is all so random, maybe its the xanax, what you think…I better stop for everybody thinks I have become a druggie. I haven’t, I promise. And I didn’t take any xanax.

The good thing is the stomach flu has run it’s course. Still don’t have any kinda appetite though. Which is not such a bad thing since it all smells gross when you got a cold…yeah I know still random…but it’s my blog

Just got off the phone with the 3rd, 4th, (lost count yesterday) person about my car and they can’t look at it either. I have gotten: a- I don’t do oil leaks, and a- Moving this week and won’t be working on anything for a couple weeks, oh, and this is my favorite- I can do it…but the estimate is… (me) $700!!!… yeah, about that much to get it running in top condition… (me) how much just to get it running… oh about $450. I am really mad cuz there is $200 worth of brand new tires on it. So, if you know anybody who needs new tires cuz I am cleaning it out tomorrow, calling a junk yard to pick it up, and buying a bus pass. Gas is too high anyway.

Enough of my randomness I am going to fix breakfast and finish washing clothes. Holla!!

Thanks India

I am sitting here writing a paper for my class that is due in about an hour and listening to some music when this song comes on…

I haven’t listen to R&B in quite awhile and haven’t heard this song before but it’s an India Arie tune and it really describes where I am right now… Isn’t it funny how the words to say what you are thinking and feeling sometimes just don’t seem to come…Well, I heard this and well…. (P.S. comments still closed)

The time is right, I’m gonna pack my bags
And take that journey down the road,
Cause over the mountain I see the bright sun shining
And I want to live inside the glow.

I wanna go to a place where I am nothing and everything
That exists between here and nowhere.
I wanna go to a place where time has no consequence at all yeah
The sky opens to my prayer

I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful

Please understand that it’s not that I don’t care
But right now these walls are closing in on me
I love you more than I love life itself
But I need to find a place where I can breathe
I can breathe

I wanna go to a place where I can hold the intangible
And let go of the pain with all my might
I wanna go to a place where I’m suspended in ecstasy
Somewhere between dark and light
Where wrong becomes right

I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful
I wanna go to beautiful, beautiful, beautiful

Beautiful

Gotta Love Google

Google’s quote of the day…

When you encounter seemingly good advice that contradicts other seemingly good advice, ignore them both.
- Al Franken

And the List Goes on…10 More Things…

…That Suck…

10. The Present

9. The Past

8. The Future

7. This Music That Is Playing Right Now

6. Life Is Not a Fairytale

5. No One Gets It

4. The Ball Keeps Rolling No Matter What

3. Wanting Off the Ride and Can’t Get Off

2. The Plate is Full

1. Life

P.S. Yep you guessed it…CLOSED

10 Additional Things…

…That I am Not Listening To.

10. Them

9. Her

8. Him

7. They

6. He Said

5. She Said

4. We Think

3. Common Sense

2. The Right Thing To Do

1. You

P.S. Guess What…The comments still aren’t on.

10 More Things…

…I Am Tired of.

10. UoP

9. Unsolicited Advice

8. Other Folks Opinions of My Life

7. Single Parenting

6. Trying to Be Everything for Everybody

5. Putting Everyone Else Before Me

4. Caring More About You Than Me

3. Wishing You Understood

2. Trying to Get You to Understand

1. Trusting You

P.S. Comments are still locked.

10 Things…

…I Am Sick of Hearing

10. Get your game face on.

9. Look at the bigger picture.

8. You can do it.

7. You gotta have faith.

6. You gotta fight for it.

5. Don’t give up.

4. It’s not that hard.

3. Someday your Prince will come.

2. It will get better.

1. I got your back.

P.S. I closed the comments.

I’ve Fallen and Can’t Get Up!!!

I guess I will blog about this before my extra special friends do…. Yesterday before bible study in front of about 10 folks I FELL flat on my tail!! I was turning and my feet decided they didn’t want to go with the rest of my body. Both my BFFs were standing there and one played it off really well she ran for a lap cloth didn’t find one so she threw a coat on me and started screaming, “Go for it, get to Jesus, lay out for Him!! The other ran over and leaned close to say, “Hurry up and get up before somebody sees you.” You tell me who the real BFF is?

I woke up this morning and my hip and back is jacked up.  I can’t believe I really fell. The funny thing is I wasn’t even embarrassed.  I laid on that floor a good 2 min laughing.  It was funny.  Had it been a Sunday I probably would have laid there till an ambulance showed up.